/wayvy/dayly/6/

Are you a slave to your sensations? Spending time around kids is really necessary (I think) to truly understand what an unrefined human is like. Put 20+ of them in a classroom and try to teach and instill discipline in them? I can almost guarantee you will leave an enlightened person, if you do it right.

Today as I rode home I realized that perhaps even unintentionally somewhere along the lines I unplugged myself from my feelings. Which is not to say that I don't feel them. I most certainly do. But I choose to exist alongside them as opposed to within them. Like, if something occurs that is upsetting or angering, my body may begin to exhibit the sensations of anger. Hot face, elevated heart beat you know d ting. But just cus you feel angry don't mean you need to be angry, y'know? And it's not even like anger feels good. It's definitely necessary to tap into every now and then. The nuclear option. Outside of that, niggas can just be chill man.

Is important to be able to create that partition between your feelings and your essence (not be like corny or woowoo or whatever) cus emotions are really powerful and really intoxicating and kinda draining too. I dunno if there's a psychological term or research into this idea already (I'll look it up when I'm done writing this) when people get addicted to their emotions? Like this indignant right to “feel how I feel” irrespective of whether that feeling is justified or helpful or even pleasant. I feel as though that's what I was experiencing when I had a bout of depression because I almost felt justified. Oh the world is crumbling (it's not) my life is so shit (it isn't) how could I not be sad just look around (no).

You know as an artist the whole point is to feel deeply right? Convey some deep philosophical shit and pour your heart into your work for millions to consume. But after even attempting that a few times while y'know living a fairly normal life you realize very quickly, or at least I did, how unsustainable it is. Now obviously everybody isn't an artist but you don't have to be an Olympic sprinter to jog twice a week. Think of it as emotional exercise. So the next time you're about to crash out cus the feels just feeling….

/stay/wayvy/